Here’s a depressing thought: people who hassle you shorten your life. Well, that’s what doctors are saying after digging up the research. Today is National “Get Over Yourself Day” (I kid you not), so in a spirit of wanting to increase my years rather than shortening them, I’m going to smile and try to be more optimistic.
The daily grind gives us constant opportunities to get annoyed. You can drop the toast (the wrong side down), and getting the car out of the turning may take forever. We know we live in stressful times when blood pressure can rise every day. In my case, watching the England rugby team lose – too many times. I think we all know there are endless chances to find hassle and frustration.
Everything is a choice. We can say we can ignore the things that annoy us, but it’s easier said than done. From a performer’s perspective, it’s hard to deal with criticism, that nagging thought that you weren’t as good as you thought you were. That you are really some hopeless fraud and that one day the imposter in you will be found out! I know some performers who refuse to read reviews of shows they have been in. I can understand it, but I think that’s a bit extreme. Isn’t being reviewed part of the business? Shouldn’t you be able to take it on the chin? Dame Maggie Smith didn’t think so.
Maybe. I think a bigger problem can be the tendency some people have to run themselves down, to see only failure in what they do. I call this the critic in the head. It’s not easy, but I think you have to be a bit ruthless about such things. How can too much negative thinking help you? Isn’t it better to be softer, to forgive yourself? After all, you did your best, didn’t you? And if you didn’t, you could sort that out another time.
We can all wonder about what might have been if we had got that job or impressed that person, but in the words of Elsa
Let it go, let it go
I am one with the wind and sky
Let it go, let it go
You’ll never see me cry
Here I stand, and here I stay
Let the storm rage on
As a performer and as a human, I like the thought that you take control of your destiny, so “get over yourself” is a call to action to yourself. I will forgive. I will forget. I will believe in myself and what I stand for. Sure, I’ll listen to criticism, but I’ll balance it out and stay positive. Then it’s not going to make me fret, and I can be a happier person.
After all, in all the things that happen in our lives, are the little things that big a deal? I don’t think so, therefore today I’m going to get over myself. I just hope I don’t take it too far and, as the Irish say, “lose the run of meself.”
